Make Room

When Jesus came the first time, there was no room for him.  I have been an unorganized mess lately.

Nothing is consistent.

Yesterday I raised my white flag.  Something had to change.

Order needed to be restored from my chaos.

I want to make room inside for the coming of Jesus this Christmas.  It isn't even Christmas shopping that has diverted my attention, I have bought nothing yet.  And that is not some super spiritual move on my part, it is just fallout from the mess of my days.

When I need to restore order, the first place I begin is with me.  I need a peaceful place to come and sit.  That is my bedroom, my haven I have created for myself.

Here's how yesterday went down (pre-white flag raising).  Got up late.  Every room was already scattered with bits of clutter here and there.  Felt behind.  Needed order.  Needed a calm place to sit and be with Jesus (hi, remember me Lord?).  So I timed myself.  Like, literally, timed myself. Getting ready feels like it takes 3 hours.  So I timed myself.  Turns out I can be ready in 45 minutes max.  It took 3 minutes to get the baby dressed for the day and her hair fixed.

I spent 10 minutes fluffing my bedroom.  I made my bed, turned on my lamps, picked up last night's clothes, ran a quick vacuum because lines complete me, lit my new Twisted Peppermint candle, turned on my Instrumental Christmas Pandora radio, got my Peppermint Mocha Creamer with a splash of coffee, and I locked myself in my bedroom.

The day started out behind and I took an hour to restore the order on the outside so that I could restore the order on the inside.  We have to know the truth about ourselves.  My truth is that I need order to rest. Chaos is so distracting for me.  And here is what I decided.  The rest of the house might be a dump, but my room is my space to keep just so, just how I like it.  It is my tiny space in this big world that is mine to retreat to.  It is my personal retreat space.  In a home shared with a lot of other people, I have made a space to go.  I have filled this room with beauty and it is one place I can create order to take the rest I need, both at night and throughout the day.

After I sat and admired the order of the room, I flipped open my Bible to this page.  Get up and prepare.  Dress yourself for work.

My life feels like one big sloppy bad habit.  There are so many sloppy areas to address it is hard to know where to start.  Life has piled up around me and buried me.  There are so many pieces to move so I can climb to freedom.  I look at the long road ahead, and I threaten to shut down and keep doing nothing. I threaten to keep living in this pile of defeat.

But I have to start SOMEWHERE.  So I choose to start here.  With this habit.  The habit of getting up, getting ready (even if it is just a shower and clothes with no pretty make-up and air dried hair). Getting up and dressed, making my bed, and taking the first moments of my day to sit with Jesus. It seems like order always starts in this place for me. With getting up and creating a space to meet with the Lord.

And sit I did.  I sat with Jesus and Exodus 33 and spent time thinking about how Joshua just wanted to linger in the presence of the Lord.  He did not want to go from His Presence.  And this is what I am asking from the Lord.  I am asking for big heaps of desire to linger in His Presence.  For an increase of the filling of the Holy Spirit in my life.  I want to wake up.

Make room.  Create a space.  Create your own Tent of Meeting to meet with Jesus and then come.

Make room.  Lord, make room in our hearts for more of you this Christmas season in Jesus name I pray.

Window Transformations

(Source)

She lived in a normal American home.  Not too big, nothing fancy, just a run of the mill home in an average neighborhood.  

She greeted me at the front door and led me into the kitchen area where I was taken aback at the simple beauty of her kitchen windows.  No blinds hindered the light from shining in and the windows themselves, they sparkled.  

The setting sun shimmered through the evening leaves. Nothing hindered the display of dancing leaves as they lit up the grass with their shadowy beauty.

The clear brilliance of the glass lit up the room.

“How did you get your windows to sparkle so?” I asked.

“A roll of paper towels and plenty of Windex.  I just sprayed and wiped over and over until they shined.”

Her answer was uncomplicated.  It was reproducible.  I bet you are thinking I went home and grabbed my paper towels and Windex and went to town.  You’d be right.

One of my all time favorite quotes is by Eleanor Roosevelt.  She says to start where you are with what you have. 

No excuses.  No waiting for a better time.  No reason to have more resources.  You probably have a bottle of the blue stuff and a roll of paper towels.  And if you don’t, for a couple of bucks you could score some from the dollar store.

We are fortunate to live in the land of abundance.  Creating an inviting space is well within our grasp, even with the most meager means. 

When I was a little girl, I remember Oprah talking about creating a home and she said there was no excuse not to make a pretty space.  For her, even when she was poor, she always believed in making her home pretty.  That is how I was raised.  My mama worked hard.  She was a single parent.  We did not have a lot and lived in a brown duplex.  It was not fancy.  The houses around us were also run down and old looking.  But none of that mattered.  Every Saturday we took the time to make the place shine.  We took care of the little we had.  Taking care of our home caused us to respect it.  The work of our hands brought comfort at the end of the day.

Down Time

I made THIS happen this morning.

Last night we had to cancel plans.  We needed to stay home and rest because every time I sneeze I pee my pants we have colds.

So it feels wrong to create a space of beauty when I let folks down yesterday.  The temptation to feel guilt over making something pretty and then taking time to enjoy it.

Last night I fell asleep asking God for more of the Holy Spirit in my life.  I asked for deeper desire to know the Lord.  And then this morning, all this.  Plus, low humidity.  Plus, ULTA is open and I am a mere 10 minute drive to the Beauty Heaven.

It's safe to say I'm a little torn up.

In other news, I've moved to Instagram.

@salsachipgirl is my handle

I reactivated my FB because my friend Michelle had a Lularoe party on the FB and oh my gosh why do we not have Lularoe in our town?  This I grieve, but I do my best to move on, shopping clearance racks here and there to ease the pain.

The other thing I am praying about is, how shall I put this?  It's my words.  There are some words in me and a stirring on my innards (sorry, is the word innards gross?  yeah, that's what I thought too).  OK, there is a stirring inside of me (yes, that is much better), to share some things.  And how does one go about sharing the words in a world full of words?  Not sure yet, but I am surely praying over it.

OK love you bye.

Picky Eaters

My friends really came through for me with some excellent advice in regard to picky eaters.  I wrote it all down to process through everything they said, and today I'm sharing it with you.  There is bound to be something on this list that you can implement in your home if you are dealing with a picky eater.

Make sure they have healthy snacks.  This is the first place to cut out the junk.

Try to serve a veggie or fruit they like at every meal.

Ease in.  Don't serve an entire new menu in one setting and expect them to like it.

Have them cook with you.  Sometimes it's not the food, but the way we fix it.

Eat or don't eat, but this is all you get until breakfast.

Teach them this message, "Be thankful God chose to let you eat today."

Communicate mealtime and table expectations before you sit down.  Think through what your family rules are, and then communicate them clearly before mealtime.  They may need gentle reminders during the actual meal itself, but train them in a setting before the table. 

You may need to stop all snacks until they learn to eat at mealtime.

Take a bite of everything.

Eat what is served.

Offer a "no thank you" helping that scales to the size of the eater.  Once that is finished they can have more servings of the other choices.

They will eat if they are hungry!

I am not a short order cook, so eat or don't eat, but this is all I am making tonight.

It takes up to 15 times to develop a new taste for some foods.  Keep serving and keep trying.

Missing a meal or two will not hurt them.

Make the meal I want to make and have at least one item the picky one(s) like.  Put the things they don't like on their plates, they will come around and develop a taste for those foods.

Implement Ellyn Satter's Division of Responsibility in Feeding:

The parent is responsible for what, when, where.

The child is responsible for how much and whether.

Parent's Feeding Jobs:

• Choose and prepare the food.
• Provide regular meals and snacks.
• Make eating times pleasant.
• Step-by-step, show children by example how to behave at family mealtime.
• Be considerate of children's lack of food experience without catering to likes and dislikes.
• Do not let children have food or beverages (except for water) between meal and snack times.
• Let children grow up to get bodies that are right for them.

Children's Eating Jobs:

• Children will eat.
• They will eat the amount they need.
• They will learn to eat the food their parents eat.
• They will grow predictably.
• They will learn to behave well at mealtime.

Step by step through their growing up years, they build on their natural ability and become eating competent.

©2016 by Ellyn Satter published at www.EllynSatterInstitute.org

Ellyn Satter's Division of Responsibility material was taken from this site.  It is a great article with useful information that is easy to apply and understand.

Love me, Feed me by Katja Rowell, was recommended as a book resource if you are looking for further encouragement.

Thank you to all of my friends who took the time to offer words of encouragement on this subject.  I think your wisdom is going to help other mama's who are struggling in this department!  Three cheers for Blue Bell broccoli!

Crawling Out From Under The Mess

Life got busy.

Everything is bursting at the seems, from closets to drawers.  We've been barely staying afloat and just trying to survive from one thing to the next.

Every season is not this jam-packed, but this last month was one of the full types.  I am trying to make some intentional choices to get back on track.  Things like:

Make the choice to stay home and create margin.

This one just about kills me because there are so many things I want to do and people I want to see.  My kids also want to see and do.  Staying home can be a hard choice.  Evaluating our commitments is also something to consider.  Have we over-committed?  If so, their may be wisdom in scaling back.  There are a lot of things our family chooses to say no to because we place a high value on having plenty of time to cultivate our family relationships.  What do you value?  Are your choices accomplishing what you want?

Know what fills you up and energizes you, then take the time to do it.

Is it a book?  A clean house?  A hike?  Window shopping?  Cooking a great meal?  Whatever it is, create the space to do what energizes you.  Mine is order.  Chaos makes me shut down.  This second, my house is chaotic and it makes me struggle.  My solution?

I made a plan of attack.  My style of cleaning is a hybrid of Kon Marie and Flylady.  This month's Flylady habit is to spend 15 minutes a day decluttering.  I divided my house into the Zones that Flylady suggests.  Now I know my missions and can get busy.

Besides order, reading and writing are two biggies that fill my tank, so I am creating space for them.

If you are stuck right now, don't worry.  Look at your calendar and create some white space where you can focus some attention on doing things that energize you.

Turkey Day Dish

We are wrapping up a lovely holiday break.  The house is an utter disaster, four out of four kids have been in tears in the last hour, tonight's dinner is a compilation of air popped popcorn salted and buttered and reheated whatever catches your fancy from the fridge.

These rainy family filled days have been full of all of the good things of life: naps, board games, football games, fun dips and drinks, long hours lounging in bed with the lamps on and a good book in my hand, staying up too late, sleeping too late, pumpkin pie, Piecaken, Turducken, you get the idea.

In about an hour we'll put the exhausted kids to bed and I will go from room to room fluffing and tidying so that the morning will greet me with a smile, but there is something that I read recently that has changed me in so many ways and I wanted to share it with you.

I'm not sure one sentence from a book has ever stayed with me like this one four word sentence.  I may not even be quoting it verbatim, but in my mind this is how I remember the words.  As soon as I read this sentence, I had to put the book down and process for a day or so.

It is the application of these four words that infused my holiday with peace that in turn filled me with joy.  So, here you have it.  Eat more chicken.  OK, really, here you go...

Rest begins with acceptance.

I imagine the freedom that comes from understanding this concept will play out differently between you and me.

There are so darn many things we don't have control over.  We can fuss and get all worked up but at the end of the day nothing has changed.  Could taking steps toward happiness begin with accepting what is?  I'm saying, YES it can.  Change what you can, pray over the stuff bugging you, and then try accepting what is, and then step back and see if your perspective doesn't begin to change.

One of the hardest things for me to accept was that my family hated the "Family Fun Christmas Shopping Day" experience I tried to create for us several years in a row.  Bunch of freaks.  They went postal on me every year I tried to implement the new "fun" tradition.  After year three ending in shambles I raised my white flag and ditched the tradition.  (I wanted us to get dressed up cute, go shop for gifts all afternoon, end at a restaurant with a good dinner, the kind where you can order a Coke and an appetizer if you want, and then come home to watch Elf and eat Candy Cane cookies by the fire)  Turns out, all my peeps hate shopping.  Long story short, I accepted the fact that I live with mentally strange people and now I just shop and eat alone and it rocks.

This year I accepted that my high need for order and the fact that I live in a house with other people who make messes ev-ah-reeeeeee-where often clash.  Somehow I was able to accept that the Mickey Mouse, blanket, sweater, orphan sock, and dancing Santa on the floor don't have to derail me.  Might've been a Christmas Miracle, but I'm going back to my earlier statement that accepting what is might just be the ticket to living in rest.

In the midst of stuff littering every surface, I put into action what I could control.  I lit my candles and tree.  I drank fun drinks.  Every day I napped.  I read a book and played games with my kids.  Most nights we restored the order before bed so we could start again the next day.  It makes me think of Nester when she says it doesn't have to be perfect to be beautiful.  Being able to accept reality brings rest.  None of it has to be perfect.  Change what you can, pray about what you need to, and accept the rest (no pun intended).

(awesome quote taken from Sarah MacKenzie's book, Teaching From Rest)

Day 8 Unplugged

Long story short the house is louder, messier and happier with the absence of TV.

We had a busy weekend at church and so the plan this week was to have a movie night Saturday.  Y'all.  It was the best movie night ever.  After a week of no TV we all had the jitters.

The ol' Pizza Hut special supplied our dinner and then we piled into our bed to watch Inside Out (cutest movie ever).

And then Saturday turned into Sunday with all of its football game glory and here we are to today, Monday, and this is where I am at a crossroads.  Here is the deal.  I have eight kids at the house today.  And our routine is to let them chill in front of a movie in the afternoon during rest time.  Don't hate me, but I think I'm going to let them watch a movie today.

In the meantime, the TV is OFF and they are playing, drawing, and running around with screaming giggles playing chase.

If this is what balance could look like then I like it.  Solid times of play and an occasional window for TV watching.  Not even every day, but during special times.

Yesterday afternoon we came home from church and I loved what happened.  Some kids were on the couch with their journals.  Some were at the table doing things.  Everyone found what they wanted to do and got to it with little to no direction from us.  They are figuring out how to do things in their free time.  This holds immense value.

Day 3 Unplugged

Monday morning I woke up to the sight of Shane carrying our big screens to the closet.

We are unplugging from TV and video games this month, except for an occasional football game perhaps.

I have a love/hate relationship with the idea of unplugging.

Why are we unplugging?

Heck if I know.

Ha.

Well, it's because we are super-spiritual parents.

(insert laughter here)

Man.

In all seriousness there are several reasons, and they all boil down to this:

We want to reprogram. 

I can tell you this about my experience regarding the effect of TV.  Whenever we get around cable, it only takes one short day for the bad attitudes to start taking over.  The switch is nearly instant.

The first two mornings this week the poor children sat around twiddling their thumbs not sure what to do.  It took a couple days for the creative juices to start flowing again.

Last night they played board games with Shane.  They went to bed early and asked to have time to draw with their little lights on.  Today they've been creating smoothie recipes.  They are playing games.  They are creating new games. 

Here is something else that has been happening.  The boys are singing.  For some reason this has surprised me.  But they seem happier and I guess when you are feeling settled on the inside, sometimes it just comes right on out in song.  How does it go?  For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.

It is like an atmosphere of joy has invaded our home.

 

I'm not telling you that three screen free days have morphed my kids into perfect creatures. What I am telling you is that the atmosphere has quickly changed for the better and the change has been pretty drastic.

I'll be real honest.  I use screen time every day in my household and while I'm pouring my guts out now is probably a good time to remind you that we also eat sugared cereal. 

The books say to have quiet time in the afternoon and give the kids a choice to read or rest. 

Confession: my version of that is Wii or a movie.

I can't say for sure what has stopped me from enforcing the reading and resting.  Probably because Wii is easier.  There is no backlash from that so I suppose I just choose the easy road by default.

I'm pretty sure we'll reintroduce Wii/TV back into our home.  I can't imagine not having any of that stuff and I like the idea of learning balance.  But these short three days have fascinated me and I thought you might be interested.

the ONE thing that changed our marriage and rescued us

The night before, I had moved my pillow and a comforter to the couch so I wouldn't keep him up with my coughing.  Mid-episode of The Pioneer Woman I finally drifted off to sleep, it was the middle of the night.

I woke up to a kiss on the cheek and a Salted Caramel Mocha, and out the door he went for a day of work.  Our day went on as usual.  There was no big fanfare.  We threw burgers on the grill for dinner and topped them with bacon, cheddar and sautéed onions.  The six of us sat around the table and ate on paper plates.  After dinner we all ended up in the driveway enjoying a perfect fall evening.  The kids rip-sticked and shot hoops, the baby found a left-over bracelet from our yard sale and held her arm straight out in front of her so it would not fall off her arm as she toddled around.  We sat in camp chairs and talked.

There were no cards, no gifts, no diamond rings, no fancy trip.  It was us and a Thursday that carried on like the one before and the one that will come again next week.

But, even though it was business as usual, yesterday carried an infusion of celebration with it.  It was one of the best celebrations I have ever known.  Our day held contentment.  It held gratefulness that we have lived to tell about 15 years of commitment to each other.  Some years, this day has found us with a strained relationship, the hard times.  But this year our friendship and love are in a settled place and that is a gift more valuable than any store-bought thing.

If I could say there was one thing that has shaped our marriage more than any other it would be this:

Prayer.  Pray about every little tiny thing that is in your heart.  Keep praying and keep asking.  Trade in the fussing for prayer.  When the years come and go and you still don't have your answer you keep on.  Don't walk away from it.  You've been praying for seven years and things are still the same?  Keep on.  Don't you dare stop.  The work is hard but you keep fighting in prayer.

 

He may be a jerk and you may be angry but keep doing the hard work of trusting that God can give life to the dead places. 

 

Even when you go to bed alone and feel like you are stuck in a prison of marriage, keep on.  Don't stop praying and believing God can be trusted with even the most broken things. 

 

When you take one step forward and two steps back, keep praying. 

 

And when you see him blossom before your eyes because he has changed?  Celebrate. 

 

When you see yourself becoming a woman who is night and day different from the one he said his vows to? Rejoice. 

 

When you realize that contentment is defining your days and laughter has returned to your home?  You thank Jesus that He can restore anything.  You remember that He can be counted on.  Remember.

 

A good marriage does not happen by accident.  You show me a man and a woman who have a thriving marriage and I will show you two broken people who have hung in there and fought in prayer until the change came.

 

Summer Storm

The summer we had the above ground swimming pool went down in the books as one of the best.  My large flower pots on the patio brimmed over with pink wave petunias.  The profuse pink blooms looked opulent against the blue backdrop of the pool.  Our mornings were filled with sunny water laughs.  Afternoons were for lunch and naps where we refueled for another round of evening water fun.

My favorite memory of that summer was the day the storm rolled in, just as we were heading inside for the afternoon.  The overcast sky quickly began turning to an ominous gray.  The temperature outside dropped nearly ten degrees and the trees were alive with wind.  The air sounded almost like the waves of the ocean as the leaves whipped back and forth.

We ate lunch, got everything cleaned up, and turned on the lamps to illuminate the dark rooms.  The storm was brewing outside of our windows, but we were inside safe and warm.  The sky unfurled its grip and the rains came.  Loud peels of thunder boomed, shaking the very core of our home.  We sat cozy under blankets, contented as the rains fell from the dark sky.  A perfect morning morphed into a perfect afternoon.  The candle smelled a little sweeter in the air that day.

That summer storm pushed the pause button on an already lazy day.  It allowed us to rest a little deeper.  Part of the beauty of it was how unexpected it was.  Those dark skies took us by surprise that hot July day.

Most days at home hold the same predictable rhythm.  But every once in awhile, an unforeseen shift in the plans happens, and a moment of deep rest unfolds.

James 1:17

An "At Home" Day

Summer is fast approaching and I've been thinking of all the Mama's and kiddos who will quickly be making the shift from mornings off, off, and away to school, to mornings where everyone stays put right at home.

The transition into summer is painful the first week or so.  Everyone is adjusting to the new normal that will be the canvas summer is painted on.

The memory of our first day of Summer 2013 will stay with me forever.  It was not even ten in the morning and I had already pulled out all of my tricks, handed out the snacks, and was looking at the clock wandering if 5 o'clock would ever come.  The day crept by like molasses and I was petrified as I stood there looking into the eyes of my new reality.

It got better.  We relaxed.  We found our groove and settled into our new routine.  There were fights to break up.   We lived to tell about it.  It turned out to be fun.

But that first day.

Lord have mercy.

That first day is usually awful.

The day before is great.

Long, lazy days filled with sunshine and snow cones fill our thoughts with nostalgia.

But then day one of summer comes and slaps us harshly awake.

There we stand in the middle of the kitchen, wide-eyed and clutching a cup of coffee for dear life, begging God to make the days fly because they are already fighting and we haven't even had breakfast yet.

My first suggestion for setting us up for a great summer is to give ourselves an "At Home" day.  For me it is always Monday.  There is no magic to Monday, but it works for me.  You might like Thursday and that's perfect.  I would say, any day Monday through Thursday would be great.  Weekends don't count.  There is something freeing about having a consistent weekday/weeknight that you can count on for quiet.  Mine is Monday.

I almost never dress cute or put on make-up on Monday.

Monday is our day to ease into the week.

Monday is for home.

It is not for practices or appointments.

It is a slow paced day with not much expectation.

Every piece of laundry gets washed every Monday.  I like to serve a crock-pot meal for Monday dinner.  It keeps it easy and laid back.  I know that Monday night bedtime is going to land on time and early for the kids.  There will be plenty of time to read and get a good nights rest every Monday night.

Monday is sacred for us.

In our culture of fast paced always moving, going, doing, we need a day at home.

If I was working full-time, I would suggest the exact same thing.  Have a night every week where you are at home.

Schedule it and guard it with your life.

The groceries and appointments can fit in somewhere else, but you decide your day and time and stick to your guns.

Creating this white space will do a world of good for your sanity.

Quiet Your Space

Have you heard of the concept of "quieting your space?"

It simply means removing the things from your room that you don't love.

My front room has been feeling too cluttered.  When I walk in it does not greet me with the peaceful feeling that I'm trying to create in our home.  The problem was my wicker rocking chair.  It was blocking the window and we just don't use it anymore.  So I did something really hard.  I removed the rocking chair.  And guess what happened?  I feel like the room looks a million times fresher, bigger, brighter and happier.

I did the same thing in my living room.  It was feeling tired and blah so I removed the area rug, the coffee table, and an ottoman that had a hole in it.  Same results-the area looks so much cleaner and brighter.

If you have a room or space in your home that is in need of a little loving-try removing some things and see if it doesn't perk the room right up.  I know it is hard to get rid of stuff, especially if it has sentimental memories attached to it, but I really think I am finding that a peaceful space is more rewarding than too much clutter crowding out the life we're living today.

As much as I adore Pinterest and am always adding more, more, more to my boards, it is interesting that a key concept to creating a home I love involves removing to make space for less, less, less.

Bad Dreams

Sometimes the kids get scared at bedtime.

They had a bad dream or saw something scary and when it's time for lights out their little hearts are fearful.

When this happens at my house the selfish part of me feels bummed out.  At the end of the day I am ready to disengage and be done.  I'm ready to hang up the mom hat and put on the relax hat.

Times like this remind me that in my own strength I can't be the mother God wants me to be.  They remind me of how it is such a blessed gift that I can lean on His Grace & Strength to love in those tiring moments when I feel spent.

It feels like we stumbled onto an effective remedy to this problem by accident but looking back I am sure it was the leading of the Holy Spirit.

One night my son was unusually fearful at bedtime.  The night before he had a scary dream and so this particular night he did not want me to leave nor did he want to be left alone in the dark.  We did two simple things that changed the atmosphere of his world and allowed him to fall asleep peacefully.

The name of Jesus.
The first thing we shared with our son is about the power of the name of Jesus.  We let him know that when we call on Jesus the enemy has to flee.  Maybe he knew that already, maybe not.  Either way,  we wanted him to know that the name of Jesus is powerful and always just a spoken word away.

Worship music on YouTube.
The next thing we did was pull up worship music on the phone and we let the words fill the air and change the atmosphere.  A worship Pandora station would also work.  It was quick for me to grab my phone and pull up a couple songs and for about 20 minutes we sat quietly listening to truth about God.  This song is one of our favorites to play when the kids get scared.



Pray.
This is one of the most valuable tools we as believers have in our arsenal and oftentimes it can be one of the most forgotten and underused weapons.  Pray not only for peace, but also for God to reveal anything in your home or your child's life that could be causing the fearful thoughts.

My 5 Day Game Changer

Over the course of the last 14 years I have changed up how I handle the grocery budget and shopping many times.  As our family grows the challenge to be a good manager of my resources has also grown.  I've done it all-once a month shopping trips, twice a month, weekly, you name it and I've tried it.

It seems like there is always a good handful of days at the end of the month where the grocery money has been spent and the cupboard is bare and I still have mouths to feed.  When this happens it discourages me because it is evidence that I didn't do a good job at managing my resources for that month.

Y'all.

I have discovered a game changer that is working like a charm for me.

In the old plan (the one that failed me occasionally...like, as in most months except February) I would divide my month and grocery money into four weeks and make four trips to the grocery store.  It was overwhelming to think of that many meals for me, and inevitably, there would be that pesky half-week at the end of the month I hadn't planned well for.

So you know what I did?

I started dividing my month into 5 day segments.  That means 6 trips to the store.  And I divided my grocery budget by 6.  Now I am taking 6 trips to the store and it is helping me really pick and choose wisely what we need for the week.

So for instance, if your budget is $600 for the month and you decide to divide up into 5 day segments, you'd have $100 for each trip!

We have discovered the Kids Eat Free places in town where we can all eat for under $20 and I am sure to include that in my 5 day rotations.

I'm not sure why it has been so much more freeing and less overwhelming to shorten my shopping trips to every 5 days but it really has worked wonders for me.

Last month I even had a spare $20 at the end and guess what?  I used it to buy some plants for my front flower bed!  Now that was a great feeling!!!

If menu planning/grocery shopping/and being a good steward of your resources is challenging for you, I highly recommend trying to rethink your current system.  It is crazy to me that I still am working with the same budget and the same days in each month, but by re-working how I plan for it, it has given me freedom.  (it's also easier to keep the fresh produce and meats handy)

Date Night

Our neck of the woods has been so dreary.

The weather has been gloomy for weeks.  Along with the cloudy days, my crew has had one sickness after another.  I've been joking that we're running a hospital out of our home.  I have missed three Sundays of church and Home Church because of my nursing duties.

Several years ago we had a run of sickness like this and it felt like it might never end.

Tonight we had planned on having a date night and by golly, we're keeping to it.  Normally Friday nights are for couch bed night.  This morning we told the boys couch bed is being moved to Sunday and tonight is Date Night.

We are feeding the boys frozen pizza and they are so excited.  They love party pizzas.  We are putting them all to bed early and then it is Date Night at the Casa.  I'm thinking we'll get Tacos and bring it home.  We are so addicted to that place.  And the cheese dip, oh the cheese dip, come to Mama.

The next part of our date is pretty random but maybe not that random.  I blame Little House.  We've been stuck in the house for weeks so we've been watching our fair share of Little House On The Prairie.  Ever since Ma offered Doc Baker a piece of fresh blueberry pie and a glass of milk I can't get my mind off of a fruit pie.  My Mamaw taught me to brush melted butter over the top of the pie crust before I bake it and to sprinkle it with sugar.  I'll promise you right now that nothing smells better than a fruit pie baking away in the oven.  We've been eating healthier but shoot.  Tonight I'm having pie.  Pie and Tacos.  Yes-sir-ee, we are bringing some sunshine up into this place.

The boys were sad about having to reschedule couch bed night.  I don't know though, I think it's so good for them to see us prioritizing spending time together, especially in the midst of weeks like this when life has just been so, so hard.

Sometimes creating the beauty and the happy places can be tough, but we're creating the good even in the midst of the imperfect.

Well, my afternoon coffee is ready.  I'm off to finish fluffing the house so that everything is just so so that I can enjoy my little at home date.

Don't forget to light your candles and turn on your lamps and do something nice for yourself this weekend.

Pretty Table

The boys assured me they did not need to be reminded how to set the table, and that they already knew how.  Turns out, they were right.  This table makes me so happy.  It is nothing fancy, but it is simple and pretty.  Yesterday I mentioned how we like to use candles at the table.  The Dollar Tree sells a 2 pack for a buck.  It is a simple touch that adds a lot to the atmosphere of the dinner table.

Yesterday when I went into the kitchen to begin preparing the meal the house was so loud and chaotic.  I've got one boy laid up on crutches with a sprained ankle, one on the sick bed couch recovering from a sickness, the baby was exploring everywhere and dad was late getting home.

 

We had a chicken salad dish for dinner that I made up this past fall.  We all love this dinner and the kids actually request it.  One day last fall the weather was exceptionally pretty and so we made an impromptu decision to spend the afternoon at the river.  Normally I would plan the details for a trip like this, but there was no time to plan.  I threw apples, cheddar, a cutting board and knife, bottled waters and a package of Oreos into the cooler and off we went for a day of reading and fishing down by the river.

 

That evening when we came home we were all really hungry and so I just started pulling stuff from the fridge and freezer.  This dinner comes together in a snap.  I put 4-5 frozen chicken breasts on a plate and defrost them in the microwave.  After cubing them, I sauté them in extra virgin olive oil until nicely browned and season them really well.  Last night I used creole seasoning. 

 

I add mixed greens to a really big bowl and lightly toss it with just a tiny bit of ranch dressing.  Then I add diced apples, cheddar cheese, bacon bits if I have them, and the diced chicken.  The whole salad gets tossed together and topped with plenty of salt and pepper.  I'm not sure why we love this salad so much.  Maybe it is because we had it on a night when we had spent a super fun day together outside as a family.  Maybe because it is just really that good.  I like it because it is fast to throw together and I have a standard rule that a salad supper like this should always be followed by bowls of ice cream for good measure.

 

Dinner Time

There are parts of our day that we have down solid.  Then there are other parts where we fall apart every single day.  As I've stepped back and evaluated, I've decided that our dinner time routine is next on the list of things to get better at.

I menu plan, grocery shop, and try to make healthy meals for my family.  My wish for you is that this life becomes all that you want it to is that the few minutes leading up to dinner would be less chaotic.  Here's how it usually goes down. Each night I go into the kitchen to begin preparing the meal.  Then, about 5 minutes before it's ready, I call the boys in to set the table and fill the water glasses.  That may not sound chaotic, but I can assure you, it is usually not an orderly peaceful time in our day.  We sit down and everyone has their colorful plastic cup they've been drinking from throughout the day.  The table usually never looks pretty.  It usually looks thrown together.

As I was thinking through this, I thought how easy it would be to create some order to our dinner routine.  Here is what I want for our dinner to be like in the evening.

Sit down as a family to a beautifully set table, where everyone eats off of a real glass plate, drinks out of a real glass, and has a napkin with silverware at their place setting.  We do candles (I'm out right now, but a trip to the Dollar Tree to replenish my stock is in my near future), so the candles of course will be lit.

 

Yesterday as I was thinking through the current, hodge-podge dinner time routine we have, I realized how simple of a thing it would be to change.  We eat at 5pm most days.  As I thought through this, it made so much sense that at 4:30, the boys could come in and set the table.

 

I think we'll call it Table Chores.  It will include putting out the plates, glasses, napkins, silverware, water pitcher, water glasses filled with ice water, and the salt and pepper shaker in the center of the table by the tapers.

 

I'll fess up to some more bad table habits we have.  People start leaving the table and dispersing before the meal is done.  This is something else I'm ready to tackle.  Everyone staying at the table until the meal is over.

 

The chaotic breakdown continues after the meal.  Every night the table needs to be cleared, the floor swept, food put away, dishes washed, counters wiped down.  We restore the order for the next meal.  It's never a smooth sailing machine, so we're going to work toward some better habits in this area.

 

I'm spelling it out, starting tonight.

 

I'm about to head into the kitchen now to show the boys what setting the table means. 

 

Sometimes I wander if we're the only family who hasn't figured out an orderly dinner time!  I suppose it is just part of the process of having a home with small children.  Everything is a process.  It sure doesn't have to be perfect.  We have not arrived where we are doing everything perfectly. That isn't even my goal.  What we do have a lot of love between us and little by little we try to grow and get better.

The 10 Minute Tidy

It is Sunday afternoon, and as I survey the damage of a weekend lived full, my eyes see pockets of clutter here there and everywhere.  Every single room has been touched.

Stacks of opened mail, dirty clothes, dishes, cluttered bathroom counter tops, toys, cups times a million, and it can be overwhelming to know where to begin.

Try the 10 Minute Tidy

You will be amazed at what you can whip into shape in only 10 minutes.

Here's how it works.

-Set the timer for 10.  (I use the microwave timer)

-Work from left to right.  Picture breezing through your house in a circle.  I like starting in the Master Bathroom and working room to room from there. 

-Go fast.

-The ONLY thing you are doing is tidying every room, so you can't let yourself get sidetracked.  You are only putting things away as fast as you possibly can.  It can be helpful to grab an empty laundry basket. Toss the things that need to be put away in other rooms inside of it so that you can move quicker.

Stay focused and try to beat the clock.  You will be so proud to step back when the timer dings and see how far you got.

It is tempting to decide you want to rearrange your spice rack into alphabetical order but you have to stay strong my friend.

I can't tell you what a 10 minute tidy will do for the state of your home.  It took me 2 rounds tonight and I got this puppy whipped into shape.  There is still a layer of dust and crumbs everywhere, but the house is picked up and looks a million times better than it did. 

The 10 Minute Tidy will take you from sloppy and disordered to cozy and well-kept 10 minutes at a time!

In The Mood

Is it just me, or do these crisp, sunny, winter days put you in the mood to clean too?

There is just something about them that makes me want to raise my blinds and Windex the glass till it sparkles.

Once I was in the most beautiful home.  Not the fanciest I'd ever walked into, but definitely one of the most peaceful and beautiful.  There were no luxury bells and whistles about her home, but it was truly beautiful.

We spent a good amount of time in her kitchen, and I always remember how warm and welcoming her space was.  And I remember her windows.  The blinds were raised and the glass in her windows shined and glimmered.

She told me she used plain old Windex and paper towels to shine them up like that.

She gave me a tour of her home and I'll never forget her guest bedroom.  The walls were painted an aqua turquoise color.  Picture the blue waters of the Caribbean and that was the color on her walls.  The two windows in the simply decorated room were open and the sheer window panels were blowing in the gentle evening breeze.

It was so beautiful and relaxing.

I always think about her home when I raise my blinds and Windex my glass. 

It is such a simple and quick thing and yet it always makes the house feel so clean and pretty.

Bed & Breakfast Weekend Inspiration

Here is the inspiration for creating a B&B Weekend for us each year...

 

*******

Dear FlyLady,

I wanted to let you know about the wonderful B&B my husband and I stayed at this Memorial Day weekend. The small but simply furnished kitchen was well stocked with delicious healthy snacks and meals. Homemade waffles with blackberries were served from a beautiful, clean kitchen. The living areas and bedrooms were furnished with fresh, plumped pillows, lovely matching sheets and down comforter, and scented candles everywhere. The bathroom – ah… bubble bath, lotions, and fresh, white towels. The library was stocked with books, magazines and yoga videos…

 

… Best of all, my husband and I spent time together with no interruptions, chores, or traffic. Okay – you guessed it… thanks to you, this is my home. Thank you, thank you.

*******

I LOVE THIS STORY from Flylady's Website.  A few years ago I decided I was going create a B&B Weekend for us.  It gave me something to look forward to during the month of January.  Once the tree comes down it can be kind of blah feeling around the house.

When we started doing an annual at home B&B Weekend, we both had jobs and very busy schedules.  Proactively carving out a weekend where we saved it for home and family was hard to do!  I love that now, every February, I can look at my calendar and see 3 days where we spend hanging out and having fun.

The best thing about a B&B is the ambiance.

Little bouquets of flowers from the table to the bathroom make everything so cheery.

Thick cut French toast served up with warm berry sauce and good coffee make a nice way to start the day.

So!  We re-create something similar to this every year.  I go to the store and buy a bouquet of flowers and divide it up into mason jars to spread throughout the house.  Kitchen, bedside tables, bathrooms, all of them get a jar of flowers.  It is an excuse to buy a new candle.  I also enjoy getting a new book or magazine that I've had my eye on.

In the weeks leading up to our weekend (like, now!) I start slowly working through our home to get it looking good (not perfectly organized and spit spot, but better than it was!).  I am very careful with my grocery store budget during January so that I can try to save extra in anticipation for our February weekend.  We also have some gift cards that we will cash in on during our weekend.

The story I started with makes me smile every single time.  There is no place like home.